bert5: In Large Type

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    • David vs Goliath by Malcolm Gladwell, rating: 7/10 17 February 2014
      You will find detractors for Malcolm Gladwell, but I find that he does write well and on interesting topics.In this particular book, I learned a few things.  Being disagreeable can be an indicator of success. But you don't tend to be disagreeable unless you've had some hardships in life.The other thing is roughly about police state and the legitima […]
    • Chasing Ice (2013) rating: 8/10 21 January 2014
      About climate change. A photographer captures time lapse of glaciers retreating in Iceland, Greenland and Alaska. In a rush? Skip to about the one hour mark for some spectacular calving. But what to do? Conserve energy. Encourage a carbon tax.
    • August (2012) rating: 8/10 5 January 2014
      An ex-boyfriend, Troy, shows up again after an abrupt and devastating breakup. However, Jonathan, the ex-lover is like an addict, still wanting to get back with him despite having moved on and now getting serious and almost living with his current boyfriend.For what is probably a low budget film, there is some very good acting and dialog. The story is full o […]
    • Man Of Steel (2013) rating: 8/10 7 July 2013
      I liked this movie, mostly because of the rather attractive Henry Cavill.As mentioned by others, the early Superman storyline also has some parallels with the coming of age experience of a secret outsider, similar to a closeted gay kid. Young Superman has to keep his powers secret to avoid bringing unwanted attention to himself, especially before he was read […]
    • The First Time (2012) rating: 7/10 7 July 2013
      Story about a high school senior who is getting nowhere with a platonic female friend. But he then meets a girl from another high school and is intrigued. Dylan O'Brien is alright to look at.** slight spoiler **The story involves some sexual incompatibility issues. It's pretty frank depiction of such an issue is interesting. At one point, the sidek […]
    • Safe Haven (2012) rating: 7/10 18 June 2013
      Cheesy, but not bad especially with Josh Duhamel on screen most of the time.  A typical Lasse Hallström film, in the similar vein as Dear John just with a different male hunk.  Duhamel is a better actor than Channing Tatum though.* Spoilers *I predicted about 15 minutes before the end, that the mysterious female friend to Julianne Hough, the female protagoni […]
    • Psycho-Sexual: Male Desire in Hitchcock, De Palma, Scorsese, and Friedkin by David Greven; rating: 7/10 20 May 2013
      I didn't get through this whole book, but I did read a good part of the chapter discussing how a number of Hitchcock films seem to have an undercurrent of the gay vs the feminine. A male character befriends a male protagonist or even the villain and fights with a female lead for their loyalty. Greven pursues this thesis through a number of movies includ […]
    • The perks of a wallflower (2012) rating: 8/10 13 May 2013
      Charlie (Logan Lorman) is a bit too tall, sufficiently good looking and having too fine a voice to realistically be an unpopular freshman in high school. Still there are some things to like about this movie. Probably a lot of real people have the idea that they weren't popular in HS, that they were outsiders. And this movie is an ode to those wallflower […]
    • Django Unchained (2012) rating: 9/10 6 May 2013
      I am not a big fan of Quentin Tarantino. I think most of his films are needlessly violent, though I understood that was part of his style. At the time of its release, I liked Pulp Fiction probably because of the great music. But I had reservations about the promotion of hit men as good or funny.But Django Unchained is different. It is less ambiguous about it […]
    • Zero Dark Thirty (2012) rating: 7/10 24 April 2013
      The beginning of this film was difficult to watch, and in fact I didn't. I skipped it. From there it gets more interesting. We follow the young female CIA agent who kept after the trail. Her instincts are mostly spot on and she has the confidence to follow them. And shows even more confidence to keep after the path when everyone else express doubts. And […]

10 Benefits of Being Gay

Posted by bert5 on 24 June 2009

I had a thought that being gay might need a positive marketing message.  It’s not like I’m going to convince anyone to turn gay.  As is the fashion today, I don’t believe you can choose your sexuality.  And even bisexuals probably can’t explain exactly how it works out that they are attracted to both sexes.

So what are the benefits?  I mean it used to be an argument to convince the straights that gay people are serious and fixed in their orientation that, gee, no one would choose to be gay.  It’s just too hard.  Well, nowadays in America it is getting to be less hard.  Don’t get me wrong, I may need to separately and clandestinely write a negatives post to provide balance, and there are some downers out there, but there some little noticed or poorly understood perks I will now highlight.

I’m going to first have to apologize to the womyn out there, because this may be a little male centric…

  • Everyone likes being thought of as unique.  Being gay is a real distinction.  An elite crowd if you will.   You are instantly interesting.  I’m already starting to sound sarcastic, but seriously it can lead to interesting conversations, generally with people who aren’t gay who don’t understand a thing about it.  It can be a very intellectual and fun philosophical  exercise.
  • Currently an excuse not to get married.  I say this a little quietly, ashamedly and mostly jokingly, because the right to civil marriage is a serious thing, and I think many gay people at least want the option (if only not to be treated like a 2nd class citizen, and giving idiots yet another excuse to bash).  But commitment is a tough thing for guys.  Why buy the cow (or in my case, the bull — oh, the milk analogy doesn’t quite work, or does it?) and all that.  There is a little side benefit here for those unsure about the big step, which seems to be more and more people these days.
  • Gays have their own ready-made cause which adds extra flavor and meaning to their lives.  They are still an unequal minority and underdogs in their quest for equality.  There is always work to be done, even if it is just writing another semi-coherent blog post.  I think many gays would lead very conventional boring and nihilistic lives, contributing less to society, if they were straight.  At least, I think I would.
  • Lots and lots of sex, all the time!  Shit, I should just stop right here.  This is actually a big fucking deal.  I hear straight guys complain all the time.  I mean if I were on the fence, this might just be the thing to push me into the full on gay camp.
  • No Venus versus Mars bullshit.  It is almost true that men and women are from different planets.  It takes effort to understand where women are coming from.  My side interest in behavioral psychology helps, but without it, I think I would be lost understanding even my mom.  Men make sense to me.  I understand how they work.  I’d probably get on, along rather, better with men even if I was straight.  Guys might just be more compatible in cohabitation, not just because of toilet seats, but also well adjusted (de-)priorities on cleaning, importance of a good sized TV (visuals are important!), talking about politics, doing stuff outdoors, and sports watching (well not in my case, but anyway).
  • You get practice seeing the other side of issues.  I mean people might get this practice some other way — gays don’t have a monopoly on the school of hard knocks — , but they don’t tend to escape attending that school either.  I think you might be a little more compassionate person if you’re gay.  If you’re a Buddhist, this is treasure: like gold to a 49er.
  • As a gay male, you are by definition, not a neanderthal.  This is a definite positive.  I am always surprised/appalled/amazed at guys trying to demonstrate their manliness through brute force and risk taking.  I mean I understand why: women do make mating decisions based on observed testosterone levels.   I think that sort of behavior doesn’t win over the gay guys.  I mean gay guys don’t need to find a mate to procreate with and discern suitability of 9 months investment based on his testosterone level.  Gay guys base mating choices on appearances alone, okay I’m exaggerating, but you get the picture.  So, as a gay guy, you will tend to need to take fewer stupid risks and probably live longer because of it.
  • You don’t need to see Queer eye.  At least as far as looks, gay guys know what looks good on a guy, and by simple extension how they should try to look appeal to other guys (and women, in case they have one as a boss or client).  Of course, it’s not foolproof, but definitely handy and a time saver as far as shopping.
  • Gays are great at “theory of mind”.  One of the key aspects of understanding other people is understanding what they know and that you may have different information from what they know.  From a young age until coming out to everyone — which is actually a continual process — gays have extensive practice in understanding instantly the difference in what they know versus what other people know.  Having such practice can make them great teachers, actors, advisers, negotiators, spies and even friends.
  • Excuse for not having kids (grand kids).  This one is a bit male centric, may be viewed as selfish and clearly not for all, as I think the lesbians certainly will not agree at all.  A high percentage of  married women want kids.  But for guys having kids may not be as rewarding — they’re generally just not wired (or plumbed) that way.  So being gay could mean, a reprieve from the onerous aspects of parenthood: the late nights, put food on the table ladder climbing, possible career ending or at least on hold/serious doubt for at least a few years, and other soul crushing responsibilities that come with having a child.

I could even mention a few more right now: the free acting lessons as long as one decides to keep the charade going, locker rooms, how to say this… structurally better porn (all of what you want, none of what you don’t), the cool flag.  But right now I’m heading off to sleep and the awesome dreams you get when you’re gay.

3 Responses to “10 Benefits of Being Gay”

  1. hahaha brilliant!

  2. Very nice.

  3. Lol powerful post.

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